


proof of heaven as you're living

by nosecoffee



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: AU, Angst, Because apparently I can't leave the Jones's alone, Canon Divergent, Comas - Freeform, Dream Sharing, Earthquakes, F/F, Grief, He could murder me and I'd say thanks, M/M, Magic themes, Minor Character Death, Mourning, Recovery, Some humour, Why do I do this to him?, i love Jughead so much
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-29
Updated: 2017-03-29
Packaged: 2018-10-12 12:44:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10491159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nosecoffee/pseuds/nosecoffee
Summary: Earthquakes are scary, not only because people legitimately die when they strike, if they strike hard enough, but because at the point at which you're stuck somewhere in the middle of an earthquake, you feel like you're about to die.Everything shakes and rattles and falls. There's probably some glass on the floor. Fuck your TV, that's on the floor too.People tell you to get into your doorway in the middle of an earthquake because it's the sturdiest thing in the house, but what if your house is falling apart anyway?





	

**Author's Note:**

> Title from 'Pretty Women' from Sweeney Todd
> 
> I don't know what this is, guys

"He was looking for the girl-next-door. Instead, he found me. Because he didn't look next door." Jughead recites.  
  
Jellybean laughs. "The first part's good. Maybe not that last line."  
  
"Fair."

~

"What? What will you do?"  
  
Archie knew it was an empty threat when he used it, but it stings when Jughead spits the bitter words at him. He pulls away and walks into the night and Archie doesn't know why it hurts like this. It isn't supposed to hurt like this.

~

"Why is it different?" Jellybean asks. She's fidgeting, fighting off the fatigue, but even Jughead knows it won't be long before she succumbs.  
  
"Why is what different?" He replies. Her hand is curled in his, soft, her nails biting into his palm.  
  
You wouldn't think, looking at them as they are, that they were fighting, clawing to stay asleep.  
  
"This. From real life. Why does it have to be different?" Jellybean's free hand brushes her face, brushes a stray hair from her freckled cheeks.  
  
"Because now would we differentiate otherwise?" The grass isn't itchy like it is in real life. It's soft. There are flowers in Jellybean's hair.  
  
"I guess." She grips his hand tighter, reaching over her own body to hold his wrist with her other hand. "You'll be here tomorrow?"  
  
Jughead nods, the feel of his hair brushing along the grass. It's strange, but it feels right. "I promise."  
  
"Good."  
  
He wakes up and feels his bones crash back down to earth, feels the heaviness in his head, the ache in his lower back.  
  
Jughead's back under the stairs. Is it worth it?

~

He promises each her each night that he'll be there the next. To lie in the grass and hold her hand, and talk in soft whispers about what's meant to be and what isn't.  
  
He's awfully like his father when he can't seem to find sleep, and he breaks his promise, unable to meet her.  
  
Jughead never sees her, anymore, except for in the dream. That's it, nowadays.  
  
Archie doesn't know. Neither does Betty.  
  
He doesn't think they'd understand, no matter how smart or intuitive they may be.  
  
Archie never asked where Jellybean went, so what's the point of mentioning it?  
  
Betty doesn't really talk to him about anything except the murder, or her devil-spawn of a mother.  
  
"Not the best basis for a relationship," he comments one night, and Jellybean laughs softly.  
  
"I like Betty." She replies.  
  
"I'm glad."

~

He knows later, red and blue lights flashing begins his eyelids, that the dreams were just foreshadowing for him. Whatever.

~

It takes a while before it gets better, Archie knows, but scars heal (that's what Betty tells him) and things change.  
  
And something's changed.  
  
Everything's changed.  
  
He watches Jughead walk out of the Blue and Gold between Sheriff Keller and Principal Weatherbee and he knows something is terribly wrong.  
  
"Call my dad," is all he says, voice thick with something Archie doesn't quite recall, eyes full of defiance.  
  
Archie wants to be the one to see him after Sheriff Keller leaves the room, and then he remembers that Betty and Jughead have a thing (and, God, how could he forget?) and lets her in, instead, barely catching a glimpse of him in the stark room.  
  
Archie watches his dad lie for Jughead, forge papers for him, invite him into their house.  
  
Archie sees the way he scowls, the way his chin scrunches up and wobbles, the way his eyes have a sheen of tears over them.  
  
Watches him hold back sobs and gasps.  
  
Remembers the one time he saw Jughead cry, years ago, now.  
  
He's awake in the middle of the night, thinking about it when Jughead whispers from the air-mattress, "Scoot over?"  
  
Archie has never been good at saying 'no' to people, so it's not shocking at all to him that he obliges him, throat thick and sticky with sleep.  
  
Jughead lies down beside him, head on Archie's arm.  
  
Archie feels the trickle of wetness on his skin and looks at Jughead's face for the traces he saw earlier in the day.  
  
Except that his face is calm and smooth, and there's no trace of fear or aggravation. His eyes aren't even open.  
  
He looks almost asleep, breathing ragged as he drifts.  
  
Jughead isn't crying.  
  
He's just...leaking.  
  
Archie Googles it the next day, when Jughead's in the shower, and one word is prominent.  
  
Epiphora.  
  
It seems so delicate, so cold.  
  
He doesn't mention it to him.  
  
Doesn't really know why he went looking in the first place.

~

Archie thinks he sees Jughead in the pawn shop one day, while walking home from Veronica's, thinks he sees him hand over a watch and a string of pearls that's too long to be Veronica's.  
  
Sees Jughead, a few days later, at the one music store in town, buying records.  
  
Sees him in an expensive shoe store buying shiny midnight blue Doc Martins.

~

Having seen all this, Archie's not even surprised when Jughead takes them all up to Greendale for a day trip.  
  
Veronica's fussing over all the second hand stores, and the milk bar, and the quaint little lake. She drags Betty onto a park bench, holding a sweet little ice cream cone with two scoops of strawberry, and chocolate sprinkles on the top, and kisses her sweet on the lips.  
  
Archie, however, follows Jughead to a little café, sees the girl, who isn't quite as little as he remembers, and sees Jughead hug her tight, hand over the box with the records and the Doc Martins in them. Reads his lips as he says 'happy birthday' to her.  
  
Archie knows better.

~

It's later that night that he gets a call from a phone box in Greendale and has to steal his dad's pick up to go and get Jellybean from the rain she's surely standing in, by the side of the road.

~

"I have a question."  
  
"Shoot."  
  
"Why are you wearing all grey?"  
  
"I'm in mourning, Archibald. Us Jones's don't look too good in black."  
  
"I've seen Jughead in black-"  
  
"And he looked like Wednesday Addams. I know this, because I saw him at moms funeral."  
  
"I'm sorry about Gladys."  
  
"You and me both, buddy."  
  
"How long ago was it?"  
  
"A few months? I'm not quite sure, but grammy sent me here, said dad would come to his senses eventually, and my presence might help."  
  
"You hear what happened with Jug?"  
  
"Who didn't? I also heard dad showed up and made a lot of promises."  
  
"You think that'll be enough?"  
  
"For dad? He's made a lot of promises while I've been alive, and if my memory serves correctly, he's probably kept about a third of 'em."  
  
"I'm sorry."  
  
"Don't be a dolt, Archibald. It's not a good look for you."  
  
"Oh."  
  
"Listen. My dad's made a lot of mistakes, broken a lot of promises. Jug's been hurt a lot, by stuff dad's done. I don't want him getting hurt again. I need you to promise me - promise me - that you can be what he needs. That you are what he needs."  
  
"I - Jughead and I - we're not - what I mean to say-"  
  
"I'm not an idiot, so don't treat me like one. I know how you feel about him. He's told me the way he feels about you."  
  
"But you only spoke at the café-"  
  
"I knew you were eavesdropping."  
  
"How?"  
  
"You wouldn't believe me."  
  
"I'd like to think I would."  
  
"I'm sure you would. Just promise me you won't hurt him."  
  
"I'll try-"  
  
"Don't make me go all Yoda on you, because I will. Tell me you can be what he needs or tell me that you can't."  
  
"I can. I care enough about him."  
  
"Good."

~

Earthquakes are scary, not only because people legitimately die when they strike, if they strike hard enough, but because at the point at which you're stuck somewhere in the middle of an earthquake, you feel like you're about to die.  
  
Everything shakes and rattles and falls. There's probably some glass on the floor. Fuck your TV, that's on the floor too.  
  
People tell you to get into your doorway in the middle of an earthquake because it's the sturdiest thing in the house, but what if your house is falling apart anyway?  
  
It feels like the world's given up on you. In the moment you don't know of its a 6.8 on the Richter scale, or a 1.9, or if the Earth is really just cracking at the seams and everyone's about to die.  
  
It makes no sense, but in the moment, in the haze of fear, it's the only rational thought.  
  
_Oh god, I'm going to die._  
  
Luckily, it doesn't happen too often as far inland as Riverdale is.  
  
Until it does and Jughead is blinded with fear in the dingy trailer with his father and his sister, the trailer whose door doesn't close properly, whose floor are cracking and splitting, whose very foundations are disintegrating.  
  
Jughead runs for a doorway.  
  
That's when he hears Jellybean scream and leaves safety, because fuck safety, his _sister-_

~

When the earthquake hits - a whopping 5.9 - Archie's at Pop's and the table starts vibrating and Veronica gets this look in her eye, and she immediately tugs him and Betty under the table as everything starts to shake violently.  
  
Archie hears Cheryl shriek, hears Reggie yell. Everything rattling and someone's screaming - Ginger, Archie thinks absently - and Veronica's clutching her pearls with her free hand and murmuring what appears to be a prayer under her breath.  
  
Archie grips Betty's hand like a vice, not unlike how she's clutching his, but all he can think about it Jughead, promising to meet them in a few, Jellybean in tow.

~

The earthquake stops after what feels like hours but was probably only ten minutes.  
  
Archie immediately bolts upright, staggers with his wobbling legs, and sprints put the door.  
  
He calls Jughead's name, as he runs down the route he and Jellybean would've taken. He can hear a siren.  
  
He reaches the trailer park and feels his blood run cold.  
  
Outside Jughead's trailer is an ambulance - or, at least, what used to be the trailer. It was old, well-lived-in, but seeing it with its roof caved in like that makes him scared beyond reason.  
  
Archie's running before he can even think about it.  
  
There are paramedics on the scene and FP Jones is yelling at one of them. "My children are in there! They could be dead! You need to help them!"  
  
"Sir, we're doing everything we can-" the paramedic tries, but FP's pissed and scared.  
  
"GET THEM OUT!"  
  
The idea that Jellybean and Jughead were still in the building chilled him to his bones.  
  
It takes what feels like eternity for the paramedics to actually get into what's left of the house, and after that it's moments before they're hauling two stretchers out of the house.  
  
There's Jellybean - shiny midnight blue Doc Martins, grey jeans, grey tank top, faded brown leather jacket - and there's blood blooming and spreading all over her, face pale, freckles and moles much more stark in her pallor.  
  
And there's Jughead - barefoot, black jeans, white tank top, flannel, crown beanie - and he's so alive, covered in blood as he is, and he's making this pained noise that's louder than a whimper, yet not quite a scream.  
  
Archie thinks he might be screaming, because someone's clutching his arm and telling him to stay calm, asking him if he's hurt.  
  
Archie rushes to the ambulance where they're loading the stretchers, and FP, but they bar him from it.  
  
"Are you family?" They ask and as he shakes his head they slam the doors shut and the siren starts up again, wailing as the vehicle speeds towards the hospital.  
  
The only thing Archie knows is that he needs to be there.

~

"Do you think this is it?" Jellybean asks. Jughead knows they're dying - her much faster than him for some reason, even though he curled around her as the roof caved in - so he's trying to savour every moment.  
  
And to think that he fought to stay in this place while he was still able to regain consciousness.  
  
"No." He replies, squeezing her hand that's getting limped and more pliant by the second. "No, of course not. There's got to be something better. There is. I promise."  
  
"How can you know?" She whispers, and there's a strain in her voice that speaks of struggle and pain. It tears at something in his lungs.  
  
"I don't. I just believe that there is." Jughead responds.  
  
"Jug..." And he knows that this is it for her. Her eyes are closing.  
  
"I love you." He breathes.

~

Forsythia "Jellybean" Jones dies in her sleep not an hour after the earthquake, her lungs crushed and punctured by her broken ribs.  
  
Jughead doesn't wake up, but he doesn't die either.

~

Archie starts to wear grey, in her memory. At her funeral. To the hospital when he goes to see Jughead, when he replaces the demure flowers by his bedside.  
  
He doesn't know what happens to her records or her shiny midnight blue Doc Martins.  
  
He wishes he did.  
  
Archie hasn't really slept since the earthquake. Any bit of rest he finds is tossing and turning and incomplete, and he never fully falls off the deep end.  
  
It's driving him insane, because he knows he'll only sleep when he knows for sure Jughead won't die.

~

Jughead hasn't been alone in a dream since before Jellybean was born. He can't get up.  
  
He figures his back is broken or something, considering how hard the roof had hit him when it fell in.  
  
All he can do is stare at the moonlit canopy above him.  
  
It never changes.  
  
It's always night here.  
  
There's no one to hold his hand anymore, to whisper into the abyss.  
  
Jughead cries.

~

"How is he?" Betty's soft voice startles him. Archie shifts to look at her as she puts her hand on his shoulder and sits down heavily in the chair beside him.  
  
He looks back to the oxygen mask over Jughead's nose and mouth, the beeping and zig-zag line of the heart rate monitor.  
  
"A bit better. There's been no obvious improvement, but his spine's healing just fine. Doctors think he isn't mentally ready to wake up yet." Archie replies, and he actually hasn't spoken to a anyone in a while. His voice is grating. "I just want him to wake up."  
  
"I know." The absolute sorrow in her voice shakes him. Because, of course, before Veronica, she'd been with Jughead. Of course, Archie thinks, almost bitterly. "Oh, Archie."  
  
He goes to sleep, even though he's scared of waking up to find Jughead gone.

~

"Fancy seeing you here." Jughead murmurs. It's not really a surprise to see Archie here. He blinks, one moment the grass is empty except for him. The next, there's Archie.  
  
It's both a relief and not.  
  
He doesn't know if Archie knows this is real.  
  
"I miss you, so much." Archie is crying. That's wrong.  
  
"I'm sorry." Is all Jughead can make himself say.  
  
"It's not your fault. No one coulda known it'd happen." He gasps, hiccuping and sobbing through his tears.  
  
Jughead can't really move, but he reaches his hand across the grass, grasping Archie's, the way he used to hold Jellybean's when they were worlds away from each other.  
  
"I promised her I'd keep you safe - that I'd protect you - and I couldn't." Archie shuffles across the grass, close to him, presses Jughead's hand, the one he's holding, to his face. He kisses it softly.  
  
"There are some promises in this world that you can't keep, Archie." Jughead informs him, gravely.  
  
"I just don't want to wake up and find out you've died while I couldn't be there." He almost snorts at the obscurity, and finds tears gathering in his eyes.  
  
"I think your sleep schedule is a little more important than watching my heart monitor go flat." He says instead of breaking down for the twentieth time since Jellybean vanished.  
  
"Don't say that." Archie hisses, lips moving numbly against the skin of Jughead's palm, in such a way that it actually makes him shiver. "You always talk about yourself like you're not worth anything, and I just want to show you that you're more important than anything else in my life. You're always talking like that, even when it's not even you talking." Ah, there's the answer to his question. Archie thinks he's truly dreaming.  
  
"So you don't think this is real?" Jughead inquires, staring up at the canopy in favour of looking at Archie and crying.  
  
"I've been delivered no evidence to the contrary." The redhead replies.  
  
"You get awfully wordy when you're sleepy."  
  
"It's a gift."  
  
"I think you should wake up now."  
  
One moment he's there - Jughead blinks - and the next he's gone.

~

Archie is not there when Jughead wakes up.  
  
He finds out when Veronica tells him. That Betty skipped practice to go see him, and she dropped coffee on her shoes when she walked into his room and found him awake.  
  
Veronica calls Smithers to come and drive them to the hospital, and they arrive just in time for Jughead to be asleep again, but only temporarily this time.  
  
Betty's eyes are red, and so is her nose, and are walks out with her head on Veronica's shoulder.  
  
And Archie is left to wait by his bedside again.

~

Jughead doesn't talk much when he's awake, now.  
  
His back will never be the same, the doctors say, but he'll walk.  
  
He doesn't leave the hospital for a while.  
  
FP moved to the local motel, and has been living there ever since.  
  
Archie's not about to let Jughead go back to the closet underneath the stairs at school like he's a severely damaged Harry Potter.  
  
Jughead doesn't say much now that he's awake.

~

Archie ties up the shoe laces of Jughead's Converses and looks up at him.  
  
Jughead's doing that thing - what was it again?  
  
Epiphora.  
  
He knows he's not just crying because his chin isn't scrunching up, and he isn't wrinkling his nose.  
  
He's just leaning against the wall, shoes up on the quilt, hands resting in his lap. He's staring off to the side, at the pillows at the head of the bed, with a dazed, blank look.  
  
Like he's not quite there.  
  
Archie reaches up to touch his chin.  
  
Jughead blinks, appears to come back to himself. He looks at Archie, a stray tear trailing down next to his nose.  
  
"You know, while you were in a coma, I had a dream about you." Archie begins.  
  
"I know." Jughead says, voice steady, level.  
  
"You know?"  
  
"I was there, dumbass. We had an entire conversation. I even asked you if you thought it was real."  
  
"So it was real?"  
  
"Real as I am."

~

The shiny midnight blue Doc Martins got donated to charity by FP a little after her funeral. Jughead's distraught when he finds out, because she'd barely started wearing them in when she died.  
  
Veronica saved as many of Jelly's records from what remained of the trailer as she could, but in the end there was only three Pink Floyd albums not damaged.  
  
Jughead's not sure he even wants them, because he never really liked Pink Floyd, but Fred puts them on the turntable and Jughead listens through an entire record.  
  
He breaks down when the record starts skipping, alerts him that it's over, and tells him that he can't pretend she's there with him anymore.  
  
Archie's there within a minute, putting the record away delicately and leading Jughead up to bed.

~

It'll take a while before it gets better, Archie knows, but scars heal and things change.

**Fin.**

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading this, I hope you liked it. If you did, please feel free to leave a comment and/or kudos, and track me down on Tumblr @nose-coffee.
> 
> (If you're interested in more quality content, check out @oopsiwroteathing and @angeburger)
> 
> If you're still waiting on Breakfast Club AU, I promise it'll be up soon.
> 
> Again, thank you!


End file.
